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Sunday, July 17th, 2005
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1:35 pm - READ MY JOURNAL HERE
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If you are sad that I don't write in this anymore you can view my new journal at the following link.....I write in my one at myspace...here's my link....ENJOY! =)
http://blog.myspace.com/2948322
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, June 9th, 2005
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10:36 pm
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I wan to update but let's just say I HAVE BEEN REALLY BUSY!!!! I worked two jobs today and yesterday I was gone 16 hours! So, hopefully one day soon I will get a break to update you on my so called happening life! I hope everyone is doing okay!
God Bless
Love, Sarah
current mood:  okay
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, May 29th, 2005
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5:04 pm - just for you to know......
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I get the internet back on June 7th! So, I'll update then. If you need me in the meantime call my cell phone!! =)
Love ya all
current mood:  hungry
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, May 17th, 2005
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11:27 pm - This kind of makes me think of my situation right now
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Kelly Clarkson - Addicted
It's like you're a drug
It's like you're a demon I can't face down
It's like I'm stuck
It's like I'm running from you all the time
And I know I let you have all the power
It's like the only company I seek is misery all around
It's like you're a leech
Sucking the life from me
It's like I can't breathe
Without you inside of me
And I know I let you have all the power
And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time
It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm lost
It's like I'm giving up slowly
It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me
Leave me alone
And I know these voices in my head
Are mine alone
And I know I'll never change my ways
If I don't give you up now
It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm not me
I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me through this
I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me through this
It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm not me
current mood:  gloomy
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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11:58 am - just some thoughts coming to my head and a past I wish to share
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I am sititng here late in the day, in my pjs cuz I didn't want to get up, the sun kept shining in my face, so I jumped out of bed. I am expierincing annoying pop-up ads, which is going to drive me bonkers. Brian put XP on my computer but somehow within the night of Sunday night it got infected with a virus, but so many ppl are coming to my rescue to try to make it go away. Thanks for all the concern.
Now, I just want to reflect on some thoughts! I am 21 years old and I have experienced so much in my life some things only a few ppl know about me. I went through high school not thinking highly of myself. After my parents divorce and being a so called dork I just didn't think I was good enough. I am a clumsy girl and got made fun of for the bald spot on my head or being too skinny. I met my first boyfriend in August of 2000, after chasing JD forever and we were just lusting each other and never kissed. Michael was great to me; I thought I would marry him. At least that is what we told each other. After a year of happiness he started changing a bit, kind of got in my face and kind of controlling. Then I met Jeff! Jeff and I were the best of friends, did everything together, especially since Michael went off to college and I hardly saw him. I kept reminding myself I love Michael; Jeff and I are going to be just friends. Well, that didn't happen. Jeff liked me from day one. I eventually cheated on Michael with Jeff-kissing continously for 3 months till Michael and I broke up. It was such a hard time fo my life. My friends disowned me cuz I was a perfect person till then. I realized my mistake and learned from it. I WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON ANOTBHER GUY AGAIN! Michael and I broke up on Janurary 6 of 2002. It was a mutural break-up, but it ended up being a total break-up a few weeks later by Michael.
In the meantime I dated Jeff and Tom Ireland. Tom is now married to Brittany and I am so very happy for them. Total cuteness! Jeff and I started going out as a couple on February 23 2002 at 2AM! This was total unfairness to Jeff because I still loved Michael and treated Jeff like crap. The honeymoon part is the best part of a realtionship and I ruined it. I wanted them both and I knew I couldn't have them. So I eventually gave up on Michael cuz he eventually told me he hated my guts. I don't blame him but it hurts so bad to know someone hates you. Jeff and I went out for 3 years! I never thought we would break up. Never! We had many trials and I just put up with stuff I didn't like and via versa. His family is awesome and I know would help him out and me out in any way. Jeff helped me realize I do matter, but I still felt a little bit below him and his family, but we managed to be Sarah and Jeff! When I moved into my apartment I got a key made for him and my landloard said if your boyfriend and you break up then if you have problems it will cost you 25 dollars to replace the lock. Well, I just shook my head we won't break up! I knew I would marry him because I pictured it everyday of my life. Well Jeff got this RA job and he hated it at first and I kind of hated it too but I convinced him to stick it out. Well, eventually it got too hard for him and he got new friends and I was too much to handle so we had a mutural break-up for a few hours and then I went back on it and he continued it. I went through hell and back through those two months. I felt so low and so unwanted, while someone just had fun! Or at least I thought! I met Paul and thought he was a good guy but we had totally opposite morals. I would continue to bug Jeff in the meantime but he still didn't want me, cuz he needed time. Eventually we got to the point where we wanted to hang out with one another. I eventually ended a freindship with Paul cuz he was just too opposite of me and didn't give a darn. Jeff and I hung out a lot and was on the process of getting back together. Well I met Brian a few days later. Brian and I had lunch and I didn't think he liked me. I just thought it was one of those one date things that I have experienced before. Well Brian did like me and I thought he was pretty awesome himself. Well ever since then Brian and I have been hanging out a lot! We act like we are together but I know I can't be with him, like that right now in my life. In the meantime I have been talking to Josh too. He is somewhat like myself and we talk a lot, but we've never met. He really likes me too but has been playing it cool, cuz he knows how distraught I am right now. Brian and I are dating now, and Jeff and I talk all the time. I tell Jeff I love him because I do, but I really care for Brian. Brian has done so much for me lately that I just can't believe it! I don't know what to do, still! Jeff had a good point that I wish to share but don't think I should share. Let's just say he saved me and if he didn't save me I would be with him again.
I realize in life that things change, people change so much more than you can accept. I have become so much more self confident about myself. I believe I am a great person and have a lot to offer in my life. I need to stop and think who would I want to date and end up in a relationship with--knowing we have a future together. I am not going to jump back into a relationshp because I would be cheating everyone!
Back in 8th grade I never thought I would be good enough for anyone. I am not conceited, but a lot of people told my parents I would have guys lined up at my door, well that didn't happen till now. Never thought it would happen, but it has. And now, I am not sure why, I went from a dork to a well-respected woman.
I am not a person with a big ego at all. I would do anything for anyone before myself, so I am not a type of person to hurt a soul but I know I'll have to do so. Well, I guess I have rambled enough, but I still am a confused Sarah!
A few good things about Jeff and I breaking up........
1. It made me realize that Michael is so no good for me and I should stop caring about him!
2. Told me who my true friends are.
3. Let me meet guys, which I never had guy friends, I always stayed away from them...except Doug of course!
4. Made me realize I have problems with jelously and overreacting.
5. Let me become more confident
6. Become closer with my brother.
Anyways it is shower time. I am getting tired of those pop-ups, so I need to go away from my computer! =)
I hope you have a blessed day. Love you all!
Aww Zoe is sleeping on my computer desk and her paw is on my tape dispenser. How cute! She's so adorable!!!!!!! Where's my camera! :)
Love, Sarah Lynn
current mood:  flirty
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| Sunday, May 15th, 2005
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10:42 am - I am breaking............
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AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Okay, once again, I have to clean up puke...but at least it's just fluid puke. So, I gave the child some water and a bucket, again! I need to get him to do his homework soon, though! :(
Also, I fixed myself my poptart I brought here. Well, dumb me was wondering why the poptart wouldn't pop out ot the toaster........well it was on the 6th setting. Well it comes out all burnt, but I still managed to eat most of it because it was my only breakfast food I have.........well in the process of eating it and trying to find the movie Shrek, I managed to burn my lip. There is a huge blister on my lip now and it hurts. I just want to leave and go home and just cry! I think to calm myself down I am going to jump in the shower. I am keeping my cool becuase I am a great person and mean well especially around kids, but I think I am on my last rope with everything right now. I hope this day gets better!
If anything else happens today that is going to make me want to scream, I'll write again, why because I feel better after I rant and rave! Thank You!
current mood:  frustrated
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9:44 am - so much to say..........I think I am going to break
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Hi, how are you?
I am not sure where to start at in my life, but I guess I can start with whatever comes to mind. Good news first...I guess! I got that job at Integra and I start the 23rd. My shift is 9:30-4:00 M-F! Then I am working at Cato every other weekend, but I doubt it when school starts. I t hnk I am going to be even more busy than I am now.
After working 29 hours in 5 days, I've been babysitting all weekend, since Friday at 5! It's been an intersting one and still stays interesting. Friday night we were about to go to Pizza Hut to meet Kelly and one of the kids started puking. If you know me there is one thing that I can't do that I hate with a passion. PUKE! I can't stand it! I cry and gag and cry and gag. It wasn't bad, but I called everyone asking what I should do. Forutantly the kid who puked helped me clean it up. I was better about the situation then I would of been years ago, but I still managed to be flipping out. Dad was helpful and Kelly just said clean it up. I called Brian and Jeff freaking out, like they really wanted to hear me complaining. I had remind everyone I am not having kids. I called Pizza Hut and Panelli's Pizza so I and the other kid could eat. Well, nobody would deliver out here since it's past the airport. So, the nice man that Brian is, he came and brought me pizza, even though he had to get up at 5:30 and work over 9 hours. Yesterday, the kids and I just layed around all day. We couldn't go anywhere since one kid didn't feel good and it was raining outside. Well, eventually we went to McDonald's and Blockbuster. Brian came and went with us. He helped out when one kid wouldn't listen to me. We watched a movie that one of the kids wanted to rent; then I put the kids to bed. Brian and I rented 'The Forgotten'-which is kind of a confusing movie. It's been a long time since I have seen a good movie. I went to bed really late and KNEW I would be a grouch because I knew one kid would wake me up at the crack of dawn. One kid did wake me up at 7, which means no sleep. I finally told the kid to watch tv and I'll come down there when I feel like moving. Well I finally ventured my-self down there a little after 9. I am sort of tired but but really bad. Well I was sitting on the chair and all of a sudden "puke" again. Right then is when I knew I was going to have it so I cleaned it up and left the room. The dog keeps hacking too. I hope the chocolate chip cookies he got into doesn't hurt him. I think I earned my money this weekend. I just hope the partents come back around 4 or so so I can bave a nice evening, sice I feel like I am always so busy! Tonight Brian and I are supposed to hang out-he took my computer home to fix it. I have to call him later cuz I forgot to ask him if he fixed my Floppy Drive! He's so helpful whenever I need it. I just don't see why someone would be so helpful to me. Well you probably think since I keep talking about Brian that Jeff is out of the picture.
Well he's not. He keeps calling me late at night and it's starting to aggravate me, but probably cuz I am stressed enough over here babysitting. I am sure it's not an offense to him. Well, there is a really good point that he told me last week that keeps running through my mind. I feel kind of like a cheater, cuz I like two guys and feel horrible about it. I love one and am falling for the other. The more I am with Brian there are things I like and things I ponder upon. Of course, there are things about Jeff I have pondered about before. All the advice I get-there seems to be no answer. It's sbout what I want and me being so busy I haven't really thought about it. When I think I'll make a decision I just roll around in it and go back to my 50/50 spot. Maybe someone will get tired of me being 50/50 and leave me, but I won't blame him, because it's totally not fair to either of them. I would leave me too if I was one of them.
I need to go one of the kids is screaming for me. Have a blessed week; I'll try too have one. I need to check on the cats for Kelly, since she went to Kentucky to see her grandpa, but I can't even do that, becasue I won't be able to leave today with a kid puking again. :( I'm a mess and feel very shallow right now! :(
I love you all, don't forget about that.
current mood:  stressed
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, May 10th, 2005
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2:20 pm - so much on my mind
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It has been an awful day thus far. I set the alarm off at cato and the cops came and I couldn't get the key out of the door. I opened the store because Tayna was late getting there from Washington. Teah is on vacation so we had someone come and help us out. Then I almost pulled out in front of someone. It's been one of those days.
To make matters even more hetic; I don't even know what to do about my whole single life. Two and half months ago things were great. Then all of a sudden I get ditched for a break and instead of lying in my tears I start meeting people and now my heart is so broken I feel awful; I don't know what to do. I have so many good things to say about each of the guys who like me and I could just cry because I can't hurt anyone, that's not me. Breaking someone's heart; I can't do that! I am going to talk to Douglas tomorrow and he is going to try to help me out. I just don't know anymore.
current mood:  depressed
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| Monday, May 9th, 2005
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10:38 am - I wish I could figure it out
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So much on my mind and so little time to figure it all out! =(
I would love to just type all day about what is going through my mind, but I can't because time for work is getting closer and closer and soon it'll be 11:30! So, maybe I will think about it all day at work!
I didn't mean to fall into this situation; it happened though! Someday soon I will hurt someone who I loved for three years or someone who I am starting to fall for. I just can't picture hurting anyone! =(
~I AM SO SORRY~
current mood:  confused
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12:12 am - aww how cute........
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Tell her she is yours... Just be yourself... Play with her hair. Hold her hand.. Touch her skin. Take her 4-wheeling and get all muddy. Just let her sleep in your arms while you watch football. Watch her sleep..Call her and say good morning or goodnight or just say.. I miss you! Take long walks in the rain. Kiss her slowly and often!. Tickle her til she cries. Hugs*just hold her like you never wanna let her go. Give her your favorite t-shirt to sleep in. Listen to her favorite songs..Tell her you think she’s cool. Tell her why you think she’s so cool. Smell her hair. Talk to her in movie theatres. Pick her up and pretend you’re going to throw her in the river; shell scream and fight you but secretly, she’ll love it. Hold her hand and skip. Hold her hand and run. JUST HOLD HER HAND. Pick flowers from other peoples gardens and give them to her. Tell her she's pretty. Let her pay if she wants to. Introduce her to your friends as the coolest girl you know. Sit in the park and talk to her. Just talk to her. Take her to the mall* TAKE HER ANYWHERE. Tease her... Tell her jokes, even if she doesnt get them.. and whisper secrets in her ear. Make her laugh.. sing to her. Tell her dirty jokes. Tell her happy stories. Tell her sad stories. TELL HER YOUR STORIES. TELL HER ANYTHING. Tell her stupid jokes. Write poems about her. Just walk with her. Throw pebbles at her window. When she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her if you really do. DONT ACT DIFFERENT AROUND YOUR FRIENDS. . .Take her to shows of bands she’s never heard of. HOLD HER HAND IN THE MOSH PIT. Let her fall asleep in your arms. Call her. Call her back if she calls you. Sing to her, no matter how bad you are. Carve your names into a tree. Get her mad, then kiss her. Give her piggyback rides. Go see her cheer squad even if they really suck, and tell her they were great. Give her space if she needs it. Push her on swings. Stay up with her all night when she’s sick. Make up pet names for her, but cool ones, not sappy ones. Teach her how to play the drums. Lend her your cds. Write on her. Write about her. Make her mixtapes. Write her letters. Take her to cool shops, and let her take you to even cooler ones. Just hang out with her. Listen to all the bands she mentions. Don’t tell her that her favorite bands suck. When she’s sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if she’s not saying anything. Buy her ice cream. LET HER TAKE ALL THE PHOTOS OF YOU SHE WANTS. Look into her eyes. SLOW DANCE WITH HER, even if the music is fast. Tell her a secret. KISS HER IN THE RAIN. Just kiss her. Trust her. Love her. BE YOURSELF around her. Cherish her. Ask her why? ..why she loves you.. Trust her with all your heart and say "I love you" ...when you mean it. Love her unconditionally... let her LOVE you and Just... be happy together ..and when you fall in love with her.. tell her.
current mood:  calm
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, May 7th, 2005
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12:29 am - slowly but surely
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It's so late and I am so tired! But, I need to update. I finished my busy day with moving. I really appreciate the people who helped me: Douglas, Adrien, Mom, Nick, and Brian! It really means a lot and goes by so much faster with all the help. I have one more day of moving and hopefully it will go smooth. Saturday May 27th, is the last moving day. I received the job offer at Integra today! I had to take a drug test. I don't do drugs so I'll pass. The pay is so much more than I expected. Also, there was something else oh yeah! I once again made the Dean's List! I recieved 2 As and 2 Bs. YAY! Three semesters in a roll! =)
I am glad to say that Doug looked very handsome in his tux! I picked the tie out! He's so awesome and I am so lucky to call him my friend even if we met through Mr. Johnson! haha!
Well boys and girls, I need my rest.
I love you all!
Love, Sarah
God Bless
current mood:  tired
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(11 comments | comment on this)
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| Wednesday, May 4th, 2005
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8:45 pm - Two Grades In
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YAY!
Two grades in and I have an A in desktop publishing and a B in office procedures!
Two grades left!!
Oh, and I have to go to Integra on Friday--everyone thinks I have the job!
Gotta go and work on Mr. PowerPoint!
I'll write later on!
current mood:  excited
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, May 3rd, 2005
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4:18 am
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It's been a restless night. I can't sleep! Hopefully I can get some rest now since it's 4 AM!
Sigh, goodnight everyone!
God Bless
current mood: sleepy
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, May 1st, 2005
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7:15 pm - I am NOT a perfect person
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I am just really happy for all the support I have had from various people!
I also want to say, I don't have a big ego or anything close to it but I think it's odd that I am getting all these guy talking to me on myspace. I don't understand why. Maybe people see I am a great person and I have a lot to offer with my loving personatlity! I want to make things right for everyone I come across in my life. My life hasn't been the greatest these past months, but slowly I am becoming stronger. My self-esteem is better but I'll never be close to conceited! I have to be strong anyways, God has been there for me throughout everything. He helped me surive my worst case which was being born too early. I love God so much and am very thankful of him to be in my life.
I honestly don't know what the future holds for me, all I know is I have a purpose in my life. I want to get through college and then maybe I can figure out my future. I now realize my future isn't blank. It won't be; I know!
I want to thank you, yes you reading this for all the support and love! I hope someday I can be the shoulder you cry on!
I love you all!
Have a blessed week!
Love, Sarah
Jeremiah 29:11
Luke 6:37
current mood: happy
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| Friday, April 29th, 2005
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5:28 pm - after interview update
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Well I got back from my interview around 2 or so. I think it went okay. I'll find out later this week what the decision is. I am worried about parking downtown, though! I would have to park several blocks away and walk...I guess that is what I get. lol! I have been cleaning and packing. I cleand the bathroom and swept the living room and my room. I was getting my hope chest from the top of my closet down so I can put it out in the living room to move it, and well that didn't go to well. It was really heavy and it scraped my leg. So it's sitting on a box in my room waiting to be moved to the living room. I don't have enough strength to move it over here to the living room, but I think I can get Kell to help me. Well I better go, I feel lazy today!
I need to do some homework so I'll update soon!
Have a good night!
:)
Bless You
Love, Sarah
current mood:  ditzy
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9:54 am
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Aww, Marie isn't coming home! But, since I am such an understanding person, it's okay! I just hope she comes down here really soon, after we move. Well, I am getting ready for my job interview. I am starting to get nervous beause when I went downtown to find it last night I got all turned around and had to call Kelly to help me around. LoL! I found my way back to Fulton. There's construcion down there and it's so confusing. After my interview, I am coming back here and cleaning the apartment, then probably working on homework. If I have some more time I am going to continue to pack some more boxes. Then, Kelly and I and hopefully my brother are goinng out to eat and to a concert, maybe! Tomorrow is concert night too, with Brian and maybe Kell, but only after I work all day :( Oh, I work Sunday too, I can't believe it! It's my Sunday off but some reason I am working. (I usually work every other Sunday) I think Erica must of told Elaine she doesn't want to work beacuse all her finals are that day or something, but hey I have two on Monday! It's okay, though, more money! I'll just be working 3 Sundays in a row, babysitting one, and working a Sunday again! If I get the job at Interga I am going to work at Cato Saturday/Sunday --every other one. When school starts back up in the fall I am not sure if I'll be able to handle both jobs, babysitting, and school. Anyways, I need to go and eat and finish getting ready. I'll update after my interview! Good luck, me! LoL!
God Bless You!
Love, Sarah
current mood: nervous
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(comment on this)
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| Wednesday, April 27th, 2005
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11:29 pm - I AM IN A GOOD MOOD
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Can you believe it, me in a good mood! Once, yes I am! I had a great day. I feel really important right now, hopefully that will continue. I am making all kinds of new friends and feel like a real good influence to everyone around me. Also, I really enjoy babysitting. After doing it for 30 plus weeks I thought I would be burned out. But, no I really enjoy it. I feel like a big sister or a role model for those kids and the neighborhood kids. I love just watching them all and making sure they are okay. I would love to be in that siutation, living in a suburb and watching my kids and the neighbor kids some day. Maybe one day that will happen. Suzanne, Jonathan, and I watched 'Free Willy'. It's been a long time since I watched that movie. I rented it at Kelly's library (Stringtown). I sat in the middle of the couch with one kids on one side and the other kid on the other and the dog kind of sitting on all of us, with a blanket and watching a movie. Of course Suzanne had to ask me what's going to happen next and things like that, but I am glad I went and rented a movie and bought fruit snacks and animal crackers, for us. I don't have to babysit next Wednseday, though :(. Well, I guess the weekend of the 13-15 will make up for it when I am there for 49 hours straight, lol! Lezlie (the kid's mom) wants to me go see Suzanne's play at school next Thursday. So, I will probably go...aww I feel important!
Anyways, I really appreciate all my friends right now. I feel very blessed. =) Marie is coming home this weekend and I haven't seen her since Kelly's birthday so FRIDAY=GIRL'S NIGHT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday I also have job interview at Integra Bank at 12:30. I hope it goes okay. If I get the job I have to put my two weeks' notice in on Friday! :( I don't want to really leave Cato, but a bank is so much more oppurtunity. So I was thinking of working at Cato like every other weekend. I don't know yet, though! Wish me luck!!!!!!!!
Oh brandon, call me tomorrow I called you back I know you need a friend to talk too! I am here for you buddy!
And DOUG, call me back; I called you today. I wondered if you were free next Friday and wanted to help your dear friend, Sarah move some boxes. I need some muscles, since I am a weak person. If anyone else wants to help me move boxes, next Friday just let me know! I am going to see if I can borrow my Dad's van for the weekend!
Well I am going to go. I am really tired and need to get up early and go to class, work, and find Integra Bank, and get gas. Have a wonderful Thursday!
I love you all!
God Bless!
Love, Sarah
5 More Days of Class!!!! Aww how sad-not!!
current mood:  cheerful
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, April 26th, 2005
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8:38 pm - Sigh
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I am getting ready to do some homework, but I thought I would let you know how much I don't like my situation of my life right now. I hope it will get better! I have faith in the people around me to make things better for me. All in all, I try to make things good for everyone around me, I hope to get it in return! Please!
6 DAYS OF SHCOOL LEFT
What's left?
1 transcription
1 test
1 final
1 presentation
I need to go so Goodbye
current mood: sad
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(6 comments | comment on this)
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| Sunday, April 24th, 2005
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8:01 pm - an update
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Well well, it's be a long time. Kind of! I had a bad day, but I had a good night, loast night. I got to spend my evening last night with Jeff, again! I really want things to work out because I do love him so very much; I realized it more since we've been on this break! Things seem so right when we are together, but then I go home and know things aren't perfect "The Reason Is You"! I would be in heaven if things were like we left them. I realize I messed up but I am strong enough to work on my negatives, beause I want to be an awesome wife and mother. I daydream about that a lot!
Today, went bad from waking up and having bad stomach cramps that lead to something I don't want to mention. Then my car was acting up but it was me panicing and my dad came and saved the day. Then I worked and didn't want to be there cuz my stomach hurt. It went by fast cuz we had markdowns.
Friday I got my paper done and ate dinner with dad. This weekend MARIE is coming home. I am off Friday and Sunday! So, it should be a good weekend, with the girls on Friday night. I am going to finish my presentation this week but I almost done with it. I worked on it a lot this weekend. I can't believe my first year at Ivy Tech and third year of college is almost done. After graduation which is next year, it's really time to figure out my future......if Jeff and I are beack together *looking strong I suppose* then it will be planned around us, otherwise I believe on moving away. A lot of things can happen in a year, so I don't know why I am thinking of when I graduate. Maybe cause I have come a long way from kindergraten, when things didn't look so bright for me.
Well I am going to go cuz Kelly is going to take pictures of me because she needs some cute pictures for her class. I shall write later this week. Have a good week. Remember God loves you and so do I!
LUKE 6:37
JEREMIAH 29:11
Love, Sarah
current mood: okay
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| Tuesday, April 19th, 2005
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9:38 pm - life isn't always so easy
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I am glad you like my hair brandon! I wonder if any other live journal ppl like my hair. Everyone who has seen it has loved it. So I guess it was a good change. But, I hope if someone doesn't like it they would tell me. Well my leg muscles have been hurting me a lot lately. I wake up in the middle of the night with horrible pain like a so called charile horse but horrible pain that I could cry about and then the next day they stay sore. I think it's a bit odd.
I was with Jeff last night. I had a truly great time and I believe he did too. There is no doubt in my mind I really love him. I come home after work and sit here by myself and realize how much life can be changed. I have been sitting here and one song keeps going through my mind. Turn Back Time' - Cher. (If I could turn back time if I could find a way) I think of that song and then I think of all the people who die and their loved ones saying if I can turn back time and just done this or that. But, no we humans aren't perfect. We live, learn, and keep living and learning. Nobody ever told me life would be easy because it's not. It's a daily sturggle, but I do have faith in God, myself, and everyone around me to make it the best to their ability. I belive I am a stronger individual then I was, although at a few moments I sit and think of how to plan my empty future, not saying my future will always be looking empty, just right now it's that way. I belive I have a purpose in this world and I believe I am a great indivdual, let alone have a lot to offer God, my family, friends, and my soulmate wherever he may be under the bright filled stary night. I know God knows who my soulmate is. One day life will be okay! I know it will!
But for now I need to go I have a test tomorrow and my grade is either going to go up or down cuz of this test. I haven't really studied much for it, so I need to get my butt in gear. So, many things to do in so little time. FRIDAY=CATCHING ALL THE WAY UP DAY!
250 pt. huge paper
150 pt. flyer
100 pt. portfolio
7 transcriptions
2 tests
1 final
all in 10 more class days, AAAHHHHH
Stresed is what I am!!!!!!!!!
I'll need a back rub when this is all done.
Goodnight, Love Ya!
God Bless
Love, Sarah
current mood: stressed
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